In My Dreams
by Andromeda4
Summary: SPOILERS AHEAD! After the game, Lulu reflects on her her feelings for Auron. I know, don't say it. that sounds boring, and yoou're all screaming at me, but really, I think this is pretty good (shameless self advertising)


In My Dreams  
  
  
  
  
  
Well, maybe you're a big fan of Lulu x Auron, or maybe you were in the mood for something a bit angsty (combination of both for me). Even if you don't want either of these things, now that you're here, you may as well take five minutes (or ten, or three, or 30 depending on how fast you read) and read this fic.  
  
Oh, and one more thing……  
  
REVEIW PLEASE!!!!!!!  
  
Ahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You don't know how much that would mean to me! You know how desperate I am? NO? Well here's proof:  
  
FLAMES WELCOME  
  
There. You see? I want reviews so badly that I'll accept anything!  
  
A/N: Actually please don't flame me. And on that note lets get started! This written from Lulu's perspective, and it has spoilers, so BEWARE!!!  
  
  
  
  
  
I'll know when I'm in love when my reality is so good I won't want to go to sleep  
  
Anonymous  
  
  
  
  
  
Now that Yevon has been revealed as the demon it actually is, many have turned their hearts and faith towards another. Some speak that this goddess has a mercy and love that their Yevon did not. The priests claim that at the end of your life, if you have up held your honor and integrity, that your spirit is granted a final wish.  
  
Sometimes, when I awaken in the dead of night, tears running down my temples from having another dream of you, my mind tells me that my wish shall be to have never laid eyes upon your face. But yet, in my heart, I know that however short your time in my life was, you touched upon my existence in a way I cannot even begin to fully comprehend. A shadow of a man long gone you may have been, but, in my eyes, there was something about your quiet wisdom, your aura of strength that made you more alive to me than anyone I had ever known.  
  
Perhaps I was simply trying to fill in the void that Chappu's absence had left in my being. But now, reflecting on my feelings for you, I can differentiate between my love for you and him. For him, there was a raw lust, a sexual desire. Of course, I was devastated when he died, but looking back, I can't understand why. He was more of my friend, my confidant, than my lover.  
  
But for you, my fallen knight, my feelings are those of adoration and admiration. My passion for you borders on obsessive, and my heart is yours completely, to the point where my thoughts are of little else. Even in my sleep I am plagued by the memory of you, and the thoughts of what could have been. I have realized that without you I will find no rest in this realm, no peace from your presence which I feel everywhere.  
  
Now that I have discovered this, a feeling of desperation, akin to the one that I felt the day you left us, has come over me. I know that I will only be able to sleep when at last I am reunited with you in the farplane, but I still try to be strong, for the sake of Yuna. I know all to well what it is like to have lost someone that you truly love, and she has already been through that ordeal.  
  
I can still remember the day your spirit left our world. The way you walked towards Yuna, your pride still in your stance. When you walked past me you said not a word, it was then that I wondered if you had yet realized my feelings for you. You turned to our young summoner, and you half begged and half pleaded with her, "Don't stop." Did you realize how much you had wounded me? Did you realize that it took every bit of strength in my body to keep myself from running up to you and throwing my arms around you?  
  
We had so much in common, you and I. Sometimes when you sat, lost in some thought of yours, I could tell that something was upsetting you. You never spoke to any of us about your feelings, though. If you were ever frightened, or sorrowful, I never knew. I would have given my whole world to have been able to talk to you for five minutes, to simply hear what you had to say about something other than our quest, and to be able to tell you how I felt.  
  
  
  
Now, when I think of you, I know what my wish will be. I have come to realize that the love I have given you is stronger than the veil of death itself. When I meet my end, I will pray that I will get to see you again. And this time, I will not let opportunity pass me by. I will not be a coward. I will show you the depth of my feelings for you, my warrior.  
  
My love.  
  
My Auron.  
  
  
  
  
  
Awwwwww………………  
  
That's sad. No, I mean my writing is so pathetic, it's actually sad. Hmmm… well, I guess you should read and review anyway. If people like it that much, maybe I can write a sequel.  
  
Love You!  
  
Sarah! 


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